Covid brain

So…I apparently forgot to write a post on Monday, and didn’t realize it until today. Pre-pandemic Sarah would not have let something like this slip, or would have at least noticed a day later. That was when I actually had some executive function in my prefrontal cortex. Nowadays – not so much.

A few weeks back, meeting a friend for a walk in the park, I mentioned that I hadn’t seen her for ages. She laughed and reminded me that we had gone on a bike ride just the week previous. I’ve become so forgetful with my packing that I have a checklist taped to the front door so I don’t leave without Pinkerton’s leash and my concert shoes.

I’ve heard the term “Covid brain” tossed around a lot – it’s probably a function of being lost in the groundhog day of pandemic life, as one day slides into another. It’s hard to be sharp when time feels like a puddle.

More importantly, many of us have neither the kinds of interactions with others nor the daily activities that kept us on our toes. Human beings, as much as we like our comforts, thrive on novelty and surprise and the little serotonin bursts they bring. Lacking this stimulation, it feels like our brains become sluggish.

I had a difficult time with memory in the worst of my depression. Part of it was because I felt so dissociative, few things registered as “real”, and so I had little recall of them. My mind always felt sludgy, and focusing on anything was a tremendous act of will. Covid brain feels different – rather than being stuck in a muddy bog, it’s like being in a pool of tepid water, neither here nor there, just not wanting to move.

So. Apologies for my brief absence. Hopefully I’ll be able to keep to a …. what was I talking about again?

4 thoughts on “Covid brain

  1. Allen Miller says:

    Hang in there Kiddo. This is just a little precursor to old age and retirement, when the memory game really gets fun and the points double! Retirement turns a week into six Saturdays and a Sunday and throw a nap into the mix and you don’t know if it’s morning or evening when you wake up. I love your insights into life. You’re all right Lady, just take it in stride and don’t dwell on it too much. Happens to all of us more often than we would like to admit.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I know the feeling! On Tuesday I thought it was Wednesday and today I thought it was Thursday. Time loses meaning when it doesn’t have markers. You write really well, great style.

    If you would like to give yourself a boost, why not check out my lockdown pros list. I had long Covid in April followed by an autoimmune condition which kept me ill until December, then I got ill again with it last month and I’m now hopefully stabilising with medication! Before Covid I was rarely ill. But what long-term illness has taught me is that you have to focus on the little things and on what you can do, not what you can’t.

    https://literarylydi.wordpress.com/2020/12/07/pros-of-lockdown-tier-3/

    Like

    1. chefdorch says:

      So sorry to hear about your continuing health challenging, bu wonderful to read about your resilient attitude! Agreed that focus on what we CAN do, however small, gives us a sense of domnion.

      Liked by 1 person

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